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March 15, 2011


Dr Huge

Justina Bieber.

Immaculately produced asinine drivel that's catchy like a dose of herpes and appeals intensely to the most inane instincts of a market that has too much (ahem) time on its hands and unlimited tech-savvy.

Propelled into the viral stratosphere by the networked head-shaking of people who know better but can't resist the train-wreck spectacle of its execution.

Impact? Immense. Translation to a live spectacle? Probable. Lefsetzesque authenticity and engagement? Nil. Career longevity? Not likely.

But what would I know? I'm a fossil ...

Phil Johnson

Uh... I'm struck dumb. I can only hope that every "share" of this video is tagged with "worst song ever written". It's definitely lowest common denominator, like Dr Huge said. I mean, come on, the vocal line has at best three notes.

The "label" Ark seems to have a thing about pushing young girls into the public eye, and I'm sure screwing them for every dime that comes near.

My two biggest questions are:
Is this a joke?
How the hell did this happen?

Apparently it really took off when it was posted on Comedy Central's Tosh.0 blog. Big audience for reveling in the mishaps of others. So there's our tipping point.

As for the other, sadly, I don't think it's a joke. Ark seems to have an unfortunate stable of jailbait singers looking for a reason to be hooked on drugs by age 15.

This will be gone by next week. It's sad to think though that we'll have to hear about it again in every "crazy thing that happened in 2011" year end round up.

Lynn Monk

3 notes and they still have to use Autotune! :o)

Seriously though, this is aimed squarely at the 8-16 year-olds, and it's worked! That's business ... and good marketing.


I read a review of the song that claimed the video is about how adults prop up young girls as sex objects and bod them of their lives.


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